Affirmation: I am a good mom. I am raising good kids.

Repeat after me, “I am a good mom*. I am raising good kids. I am a good mom. I am raising good kids.”

It is easy to get lost in worry or guilt. It is easy to let fear guide our decisions. However, good decisions are never made out of fear or anxiety. In this moment, return to the present. Take a deep breath. Ground yourself. Place your hands on your heart; feel your feet steady on the ground. Maybe even touch your child–so often touching or smelling your child reminds you of your love and brings you back to their goodness. Repeat, “I am a good mom. I am raising good kids.” Breathe again. Repeat, “I am a good mom. I am raising good kids.”

Remember, goodness is not an absence of mistakes. Goodness does not mean confidence or a lack of doubt. Goodness does not mean without flaws. Goodness does not mean right. Both for you and your children.

“Pause. Acknowledge your feelings. Acknowledge the weight of the huge responsibility that is motherhood. And breathe.”

When you start to question yourself. When you begin to make a decision from a place of fear or comparison. When you begin to worry you are failing in parenthood or not raising good humans. Pause. Acknowledge your feelings. Acknowledge the weight of the huge responsibility that is motherhood. And breathe.

Adding pressure to yourself, or your kids, only makes it harder. Trust in your capacity to raise your children. Believe in their innate goodness. Remind yourself that you have nothing to prove. Sometimes we simply have to get out of the way–theirs and ours.

You are a good mom. You are raising good kids.

*Note: I use the words mom, mother, motherhood, etc. because they resonate with my experience of parenting. I recognize that these words do not fit everyone. Please feel free to adapt my language to words that better represent your personhood and your experience.